Dating After 50—What are Your Needs?
When we are dating to meet a partner and build a life together it is essential to know what YOUR needs and values are; and what your partner’s needs and values are.
Most of our needs and values are acquired as we grow up and reflect those of the people closest to us during that period. At some later time in life, mature, emotionally intelligent men and women start unwrapping the beliefs, attitudes and values that were held by their families and passed on to them as if they were the ultimate truth!
When you form a relationship, the compatibility of your needs and values will contribute to the strength of that relationship. So taking the time to sort out what your needs and values are from those passed down to you is essential work to do before you jump head first into that daunting process we call dating or wonder where to go to meet Mr. I hope you are the right one this time!
So let’s be clear: We all have needs, and our needs are legitimate. The problem, though, is that many of us may confuse the concept of neediness, something very different, with having real and legitimate needs that can be reasonably met!
Touched by The Heart of A Woman
Mothers have been recognized in special ways for thousands of years, since Ancient Greece.
The month of May is the month that people in many parts of the world specifically celebrate Mothers.
As a tribute to women all across the globe, I am re-printing this wonderful and heart-warming poem written by Bonnie Ross-Parker. Ms. Ross-Parker’s contact information is at the end of this poem if you wish to contact her directly.
Secrets to Finding the Treasures Around You
Last week we explored the unique gifts, skills and talents that live inside of us. We made a list to help appreciate and honor the treasures we bring to the lives of others.
What treasures OUTSIDE you are you not recognizing, valuing and letting warm you down to the cockles of your heart?
Who and what is a part of your daily life that you take for granted or don’t notice or get pleasure from anymore? Or maybe haven’t ever!
What thoughts preoccupy you and exhaust you? What treasures outside of you can you become aware of to restore and re-energize yourself?
Who are the folks who are not your champions; who suck the very life and the joy out of you? Who are the treasures outside of you who might enrich and enliven your life?
It’s Time to Own the Treasures That Live Within You
When we think of treasures we generally think of expensive jewels, rare antiques or chests filled with gold coins sitting on the bottom of the ocean.
Would you be surprised to learn that there are a multitude of treasures all around you AND inside you?
Let’s explore the treasures INSIDE you first.
Each one of us has unique gifts, skills and talents that live inside of us. You are probably so busy in your life d-o-i-n-g one thing or another and attending to the needs of others, that you haven’t had any time to notice or honor your special gifts, skills and talents in a long time.
Grab a piece of paper and let’s make a list together right now!
If you were your best friend (and you should be, but that’s a topic for another issue) and I asked your best friend what characteristics or personality traits she or he liked, valued or appreciated the most about you, what would she or he say?
Stop Fooling Around! Start Making Contributions to Your Life That Matter
The idea of creating a life purpose statement isn’t new. People throughout recorded history have created statements of belief, intention, personal creeds and other similar statements. Only when we connect with our unique purpose and live through the values that support our purpose can we experience deep and profound personal satisfaction.
The benefit of developing and writing down your life purpose statement is to inspire you. Your life purpose statement is the expression of what you want to be and what you want to do in your life; your unique capacity to contribute in the mental, spiritual, physical and social areas of your life.
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I'm Dr. Jackie Black, your Relationship Coach. Whether you are a Marriage-Minded Single, a Couple Exploring Commitment, Newly-Married, a Couple in Trouble or a Conscious-Couple Wanting to Make a Good Marriage Better, I’m here to help you figure out what’s not working, facilitate the shift from the tough times, and support you to make your marriage happy and lasting so you can live the life that you love with the love of your life, forever! If you are a Couple Facing Illness or you are Grieving the Death of Your Partner, I am here to support you through the changes and the challenges you are facing.
Learn more at DrJackieBlack.com
