Are New Year’s Resolutions a Set-up for Failure?

How are your New Year’s Resolutions going? Are you successfully achieving your goals? Or have you failed already?

If you are in the miniscule percentage of people who are successfully achieving your goals, congratulations!

For everyone else, don’t give it a second thought if you have already failed and have decided “to heck with that stuff anyway!”

New Year’s Resolutions are a set-up for failure. Changing anything in life when you do so with intention is hard enough, never mind trying to change something based on faulty thinking and faulty planning.

Here’s a simple three-step formula to make any change you wish in your life:

First, decide what behavior you want to change or goal you want to achieve. Carefully craft a statement about one or two benefits that will come as a result of changing this behavior or achieving this goal.

How will your life be enriched or improved if you change this behavior or achieve this goal?

Next, make a list of the relevant steps necessary to attain this goal. Be sure to include short-term, mid-term and long-term benefits so you can feel good about all the tiny wins you will have on your way to making this change or achieving this goal.

Last, be sure to include two or three strategies that you are planning to employ. Also include two or three special people who will be your cheerleaders and support you through this time of change.

Relationships can tolerate and accommodate changes if and when partners are included in the process. Sit down and tell your partner exactly what you want to change. Include all the benefits you expect to enjoy and what your partner can anticipate from these changes.

Tell your partner who is on your cheerleader team. Be specific about the role of each person. Ask your partner for any feedback or for any support you need from him or her.

This is the recipe for successful life change, not just a New Year’s Resolution that may last for an hour or for a day. Make the changes you desire for a lifetime.

Until next time remember…

Only YOU can make it Happen!

Dr Jackie Black Newsletter


Hello. I am Dr. Jackie Black, your Couples in Trouble Expert. Since 1999, I have guided many formerly frustrated and desperately unhappy Couples in Trouble to happiness, closeness and having more fun together than they ever imagined. My years of experience combined with your commitment to your personal growth will enable you to welcome the results you have always wanted and never believed were possible in your marriage.

Learn more at DrJackieBlack.com