What Are Boundaries?

If your life is filled with more of what you don’t want and not enough of what you do want, it’s time to set your boundaries.

Boundaries define a person’s sense of self (i.e., who he or she is as an individual). Setting boundaries makes others feel safe around you and allows you to feel safe in your environment. It is a way to exhibit self-respect, thereby increasing the respect shown to you by others.

Boundaries…

Help other people know how to treat you.

Define your sense of self.

Delineate how much you have to give of time, money or energy.

Are dividing lines between you and everyone else that represents both physical and emotional limits others may not violate.

Separate your needs, wants, desires, thoughts and feelings from others.

Setting and keeping your boundaries and honoring the boundaries of others are among the most challenging and confusing behaviors in relationships.

Boundaries are innate and natural to everyone. Each of you has your own internal indicator of when a boundary is being violated. A boundary, when crossed by others, will create intense feelings of anger, hurt or outrage inside you.

Take some time and ask yourself two important questions:

“What boundaries do I need to set?” “What boundaries are others’ asking me to honor?”

Until next time remember…

Only YOU can make it Happen!

Dr Jackie Black Newsletter


Hello. I am Dr. Jackie Black, your Couples in Trouble Expert. Since 1999, I have guided many formerly frustrated and desperately unhappy Couples in Trouble to happiness, closeness and having more fun together than they ever imagined. My years of experience combined with your commitment to your personal growth will enable you to welcome the results you have always wanted and never believed were possible in your marriage.

Learn more at DrJackieBlack.com